tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6867606134860164698.post9018855146669930288..comments2024-01-25T22:23:08.605+01:00Comments on A Blonde in Sweden: Behave Yourself! Part 1 of 2SwedishJennhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11143674711124849448noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6867606134860164698.post-77085205591897073712011-09-18T20:03:34.652+02:002011-09-18T20:03:34.652+02:00@Mon: As always, thanks for your unique take on th...@Mon: As always, thanks for your unique take on this issue. I responded on your blog. For those wondering about the link: <br />http://holisticmum.blogspot.com/2011/09/well-behaved.html<br /><br />@Michelle: Thank you. I agree that it's common that each generation of Moms seems to try and improve on the previous. And they don't always succeed. It's so much easier to get informed, let go of our own baggage than it was even 10 years ago now that we have an entire virtual community for support and education. I still have not decided on my definition of "well behaved" but I have started by abolishing the word from my vocab. So that's a start anyway ;-).SwedishJennhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11143674711124849448noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6867606134860164698.post-3598807900715534692011-09-18T18:42:18.375+02:002011-09-18T18:42:18.375+02:00I think in every family, what is considered "...I think in every family, what is considered "well behaved" is different. The best way we can teach them is by example, of course, but we're not perfect (see my new blog post for my rant!).<br /><br />I too have made a commitment to myself to parent differently than my own mother - for different reasons - but I understand your motivation here. we - or I - tend to fall back on what we know, but I think what is important here is that we are trying and just making the effort and cathing those moments of clarity is a good sign. I always say my kids will undoubtly grow up with some kind of "baggage" from their youth (Everyone has SOMETHING to complain about!) but it won't be things like being abandoned, not loved or any kind of abusive behavior. Ok so they may cringe when the milk is spilled or the cat gets out, but they are loved immensely, they know it and know how to pass that on to others. They are people I am already proud of and thats the point, isn't it?Michellehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16570356498500301764noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6867606134860164698.post-45601869790424030012011-09-14T12:42:04.088+02:002011-09-14T12:42:04.088+02:00firstly, it's normal to feel like a failure, b...firstly, it's normal to feel like a failure, but that emotion is worthless, and even detrimental.. so we have tomove on.<br /><br />for me, it's always about starting with myself first. changing how i view certain things.<br />in this instance asking oneself<br />- what does it mean to be well behaved and do I stand firm in those definitions?<br /><br />For me personally, the term 'well-behaved' makes me prickle and feel very uneasy. Because what it usually means is a child behaving in a way that the adult deems unlikely to cause embrassement or inconvenience to them (the adult).<br />It means a controlled child. an oppressed, repressed, and fearful child.<br /><br />Desiring a well-behaved child is a 100% selfish goal.<br /><br />oh dear... becoming an essay....<br />i'll respond on my blog ;)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11863793441609598153noreply@blogger.com