Toddlerisms Volume 1

I was inspired by Hyacynth's recent post with her favourite toddlerisms from vacay. I really did LOL. And I found myself LOLing at our little boy an awful lot this week and thinking, "I gotta write that down." Here are a few special ones:

Mommy says something to the man in Swedish. Little man responds matter-of-factly in a DUH-tone, "Mamma, you're a Mamma, not a kid!" In other words, don't speak my language.

Said when I do something funny: "Mamma, you're crazy." That's pretty accurate.

"Mamma, are you happy?" Now that's deep.

"The chasm of dead." It's the chasm of death actually. Quote from Ice Age 3.

"Mamma, be a pig please." Oh, well, if you insist. Wanting my hand to assume the Pig hand puppet and proceed talking out of the corner of my mouth in my best Pig voice.

"Dada, do you want my new iPhone?" Translation: I want to play with your new iPhone, get my snotty hands all over the screen and get you sick right before your business trip this week.

"Mamma, LOOK! It's a BIG one." Pointing at whatever he just evacuated into the toilet bowl. I know...ewwwwww, but still funny.

"Mamma FARTED!" Uhmmmm...no, I most certainly did NOT fart. That was you/the washing machine/INSERT appliance/lay blame.

I just know I'm forgetting some killer quotes but will save them for Volume 2.

Dearest Mommy Bloggers

I love being a Mom. Here are a few things you should know about me and my now 3 year old:
1. I was never a baby-wearer
2. I tried breastfeeding only to have to stop after 3 months due to short milk supply
3. I vaccinated my child
4. My child sat in a forward-facing stroller (studies have shown it increases stress in babies?)
5. Among other things, he eats chocolate, ice cream, cookies and occassionally stuff from a can
6. I use(d) disposable diapers
7. My baby didn't "sign"
8. He watches movies (I've lost count of the number of times he's seen Ice Age or Finding Nemo or INSERT DISNEY MOVIE)
9. He drinks juice, a lot of juice (though I have been trying to cut back)
10. He's had some form of childcare since he was 3 months old.
11. I have been known to bribe my child to do my bidding.


I appreciate all of you who have done the opposite of all of the above and I've learned a lot about parenthood from your thoughtful, educated words and posts. But if you've come here to learn about the latest baby wearing sling, research on vaccinations or recipes for homemade, eco-friendly baby food, it's time to click "Next blog". I don't subscribe to any particular parenting philosophy either.

I'm just a Mom enjoying the journey and learning as I go. Come along for the ride. You're sure to find something to make you nod knowingly, giggle, gasp or gag. None of us are perfect. We learn from our own upbringing, each other and from the plethora of information readily available thanks to the Web.

I feel honoured to be a part of the mommy blogosphere. J