Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Weigh-in Wednesday: Week 8 of 10

I am notorious for leaving things till the last minute so I guess you won't be surprised that the same thing goes for the weight-loss.

Oh, hello again 74.6, how I was missing your square numbers on my rainbow striped digital bathroom scale. Actually, I was sure your chunky brothers 75.6 or 76.6 were sure to make an appearance this week, after the few days of candy overdose and that bottle of Spanish wine. Damn Easter Bunny.

But here you are again, an old friend who never fails to be there for me. Even if I'd much rather get close to your much hotter sister. Look, since we've spent so much time together; 7 weeks to be exact (on & off), I feel we can be honest with each other. We need to talk. So here's the thing: I will drop you like a hot potato the minute your hot sister 69 or better yet, her tight-assed, sculpted armed 68.5 BFF get anywhere near me.

"Oh sure," you say, "that relationship didn't last the first time. You'll come crawling back on your padded knees." You're wondering how I can keep things going with her, aren't you? We both know she's high maintenance.

This time, I have a plan!

So that's what the voices in my severly congested head have been talking about since last night. Last night, so glad you asked, I was invited out by the neighbour friend for "a walk". Cool! Some girl bonding time, a nice leisurely stroll, 20 minutes of gabbing and gossip. I can handle that. Even though I was sick. Yup, sick. Runny nose, chest full of gunk...the works. All thanks to the hubby and son. But I was NOT passing up the chance for a) exercise and b) face-to-face (or side of face to side of face) friendship.

And because I was sick, I was hot (as in internal-temperature-hot, nobody is sexy-hot when they're sick). So I thought, better not dress too warm. And I didn't.

"Oh, by the way, we're actually walking somewhere specific. I need to go to my work and sign some papers."

Sure, I like having a destination.

And we started. And we might as well have been running.

All I kept thinking was, how many miles/km an hour are we cruising at here? 35 minutes later, my butt and arms were frozen, my chest was screaming and I was just waiting to collapse. But somehow, I managed to keep chatting through it all. And those of you who know me personally, well, it's no big shocker.

And then we had to go BACK!!! I made it on pure adrenaline. I know, it's not like I climbed Kilimanjaro. But for no-exercise me, I might as well have been scaling a neverending incline.

Today, I discovered a muscle in my stomach simply because any movement whatsoever triggers painful spasms. But it's there. I have proof. Under that Mommy Roll, there's a muscle reminding me to save it from near-drowning.

I will save you muscle! But not tonight. Tonight, I have to listen to my body and it's telling me to stop or I'm headed straight to the ER. Tomorrow and the day after that (walk buddy or no walk buddy), I will push through.

To commemorate my new ode to fitness, I even splurged on a pair of fitness pants. Cuz this butt was meant for walkin'


LostInTraslation...Literally said...

OMg!!! I cant believe it's been so long since I've read your blog!!!
I just realized how much I've missed it.
Can I say BRILLIANT?!?!? esp the part about the "hotter sister 69" hahahahahahahah
SOOOO GOOD! You had me laughing jen!

LOVE YOUR BLOG!! and thanks for remembering me :)



septembermom said...

I should get fitness pants too and get my butt walking!!

Great post. I LOVE visiting you :)

SwedishJenn said...

@Lost: Well THERE you are! Funny how if you don't hear from someone for awhile, even if you have never met that person before in your life, you start getting worried. Or at least I do..ha! Welcome back and the 69 part was not intentional but then hilarious when I re-read it...ha!
@SeptemberMom: So let's get going. We can walk together virtually :-). Glad you like stopping by. Ditto to you!

Den said...

Holy Macaroni - you crack me up!

I had the BEST kick up the arse regarding getting into shape today... It was so hot here we were gardening in the buff and Steve took a load of photos of us for some naturist websites. Jeez! I was running out of fingers to count my rolls of fat on! That's IT - I'm on a serious detox and back to sit-ups. Could we have another 10 weeks please?! x

SwedishJenn said...

@Den: Now that would be a kick in the arse I could never subject myself to. You are BRAVE. For me, it's enough that I see myself in the buff in my bathroom mirror. I am seriously considering an extension here but only if we all make a pact to really put er' in gear :-)

Mon said...

omg! Can't (CAN) belive you went out for a walk when you were so ill, just for f2f time! You nutter!

\look after yourself, get better!!

SwedishJenn said...

I am a nutter and I paid for it. But getting better. No longer feels like I'm coughing razor blades :-)

sapphire said...

I just ko'ed reading the 69 part!

You are totally hilarious and you are so going to kick butt on the scale.