The time is flying and my weight is at a virtual standstill. Knocked off one more pound though...so down 5lbs, around 2.5 kilos at 74. I haven't really been cheating, just haven't been eating breakfast or exercising much. I blame this on my life recently.
Change is imminent. It's on the horizon. I can feel it, I'm yearning for it but at the same time, I'm procrastinating and avoiding it. I need a heavy dose of self-help books is what I need. Or some zen-like guru to tell me exactly how to initiate the change me and my family need right now. Or some inspired bloggy friend. Any takers?
My husband has been working hard and that's saying a lot cuz he's a hard worker to begin with. He has been putting almost every ounce of his being into this little company of ours, as have I recently, and it's taking its toll. If hard work and sacrifice equaled success, we'd be living in some tropical paradise with a Pina Colada slave watching the little one frolick in the waves until his tutor came around for his daily lessons. And by success, I mean some measure of financial freedom.
We are caught up in a vicious "living to work" cyclone, working and waiting and praying for "the big break". But chasing this rainbow (bad analogy, it's not as impossible as a rainbow), has cast a dark cloud over our lives. Luckily, we're a team so lightning hasn't struck the ground between us. But still, it's decision time. It's time to change our lives for the better. I know it needs to be done. I just have no idea how to do it. Or what that first step should be. Or if I have the courage.
Sorry, it's Weight Loss Wednesday and I'm griping about a shit storm and rainbows.
Sigh...
What's holding you back, if anything? And how have you changed your lifestyle or LIFE for the better? Please share. I need that one kernel of wisdom that will give me what Oprah calls an "AHAAA moment".
SJ
Up to the mountain
1 year ago
7 comments:
I have a fear of doing something for real. A fear of commitment maybe. I can do experiments and think that 'this is ok, I'll do it for real... later'. I rather start doing new experiments on other things.
Once I do start doing something for real, I delve into details and the details of details. A project will almost never get finished.
Today I'm trying to write a report about a construction task I've been given at school. I've done all calculations and written a section about the forces required, but rather than begin on the next section about the strength of the materials I'm moving words around in what I have already written. That All I have done since 07.00 today, moving a few words and numbers around.
I need a secretary.
Oh you have the courage! Look at the massive changes you've gone through over the last 4 years!
I find that when I'm at a complete loss as to what to do next, but knowing I need to do something, make some change, I just leave myself open. Open to whatever the universe's or God's next message. Because there's ALWAYS a sign, signpost, message, kernel of wisdom, but sometimes we stampede over it in our need to think through a problem. Make sense?
Good luck hun, financial woes and anxieties suck.
Jenn, I'm thinking about you. It must be tough. I like how you guys are a team. That's important for my husband and me now in our own little "crisis."
You are one dynamic, intelligent, courageous lady! I know you will be fine :) Tons of luck and hugs coming your way. If I can't get hubby a job here, should I move to Sweden? At least we could be neighbors :) My oldest loves hockey. He would want to come!
166 again. But I haven't been able to cut calories to lose weight because of nursing, so that's what is holding me back. And I'm OK with that. :)
You have the courage and the strength to do what you need to do in regard to your health and your business. I'm certain you do.
Aha moment: Picture this -- Jr year of college. Study abroad trip in Slovenia. Walking with tall thin, blonde friend. Everyone speaks Slovene to her, English to me. I cannot figure out why. Until I realize that they know I'm American because I'm about 200 pounds at 5'4". I drastically change my ways right there and then because darnit, I want someone to speak Slovene to me and mistake me for a hot Slovenian!
Wow, that was long. Sorry to blogjack in your comments.
moving to sweden ... what else do you need for a major change?
looking forward to cycling again, I can't see the point of cycling during winter, but it feels good cycling in Uppsala, especially during summer when there's less traffic on the streets
and learning swedish - proving that it is possible to learn new skills mid-life and don't have to wait until retirement when you have lots of spare time!
@Mazui: A perfectionist maybe? An admirable trait but obviously a show stopper too. Try making a deal with yourself, "Self, you are not allowed to go back over the first section until you've finished the second section." A little more realistic and more doable than the, "Self, you can't go over anything until you've finished the entire assignment". Best of luck!
@Mon: Thanks for believing in me. The sign posts came. One was a blessing from the hubby, the other was my notebook (see recent post), another was an imaginary nail in the virtual coffin and yet another was the lack of obstacles...clearing my way for what I needed to do.
@septembermom: It's great to be on a winning team with your spouse, isn't it? Come on over! I'll put the coffee pot on and we'll get your man on the ice.
@Hyacynth: I didn't know there was a such thing as blogjacking?! Shit, I'm sure I've been guilty of it. Thanks for sharing your AHA Moment. You'll be mistaken for a hot Slovenian before you know it.
@Rinse: Hi! I look forward to sharing my cycling stories with you this Spring. The ones where I careen(sp?) into oncoming traffic, scrape my knees and fly over the handlebars. I'm pretty pleased with myself for how far I've come with the Swedish, though I still have a long ways to go!
Thanks for the solid advice! :)
Unfortunately I can't return it on the weight issue. I've always been too scrawny. It's been remedied somewhat with six months of pizza diet and push ups every other morning. At least the scale says 61 instead of 55, but the appearance is still about the same.
Apparently muscle tissue weighs more than fat, so the scale is a better tool for body builders than for those who want to look slimmer. So don't worry too much about the scale. It could be that you just became stronger, and that's more important than to weigh less.
Maybe a measuring tape would be a better tool to check your progress?
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